Barbara C Hoag.com

Before I begin I must explain that we had a little crisis and some of my posts were lost so I need to re-due them. It will be hard to recreate them just as they were so please bare with me as we start this journey together again. Thank you for reading.

Sometime during the winter Phyllis and I were asked to serve a special party. It was to be held at the Park Managers Home.  We were told the special guest was Lowell Thomas. He was a famous radio broadcaster and a world traveler. I remember watching TV specials of his travels to many far and interesting places. We were told he had never been to Yellowstone. I was amazed. He was very nice and he got Phyllis and I together and we had our picture taken with him.

Soon after Frank was baptized we started to plan our wedding. I wanted to use the Chapel we meet in but another couple had already reserved it so we had to make other arrangements. When I look back at this time I was so oblivious as to what was right and proper to do. I thought that getting married in a Church was the most important thing. So we asked if we could use the local Church of Christ Chapel. We wanted the Branch President to do the ceremony. OK so we were going to get married in a Church of Christ Chapel and a Mormon Branch President was going to preform the ceremony. La La La La, merrily we go along. Our poor Branch President was not really very happy about this arraignment. I really don’t know why he didn’t sit me down and give me a good talking too. I called my Mother and Father and told them that we were planning to get married August 2, 1969.

We went to Livingston and I purchased some flocked cotton fabric and a pattern and started making my wedding dress. My Aunt Wanda made and decorated a wedding cake for us and my parents brought it all the way up from Cedar City. They stopped in Pocatello and my Aunt and Uncle Tolman and some of their children  came up for the ceremony. My sister Sandra and her Husband Max came also. My Cousin John Cox flew a small plane with his girlfriend Carolyn. I was really surprised to see all these relatives. One of Franks neighbors  organized some refreshments for a small reception for us.

Everything worked out and we were married. After we said goodbye to everyone we headed to Cody, Wyoming for a couple of days.  Oh the folies of youth.

 Frank’s neighbor had a small cabin between her house and Frank’s parents. She said we could live there until we found something better. There was a bathroom, and a room big enough for a bed and a very small kitchenette. One day Frank’s Dad came over,  he had a wooden rolling pin in his hand. He gave it to me and said I could use it for other things than just rolling out pie crust. He was implying that if Frank needed a talking to, the rolling pin might be a good exclamation point. Another time he gave me a large chefs knife. I really liked Frank’s Dad. Franks Mother gave me a Platter that she said had been in her family for years. She said it came from England. I think it is from Wedgwood.

Soon after we were married Frank got a letter from Boeing Aircraft offering him a job in Everett, Washington. If he accepted he would start work around the first part of September. They would send a mover to help us move. I was really looking forward to starting a new life in a new place. We started to get ready to move to Washington.

Life in Yellowstone was pretty routine. I put my time in at the restaurant and then there was time to play. There is a chapel built on the property at Mammoth and there was a small branch of the Church that met there on Sundays. The Branch President was one of the Rangers. One of the ladies I worked with was a member and most of the members were either employees of the park service or employees of the vendor. I was asked to lead the music in Sacrament meeting. Sometimes we didn’t have a piano player. They had a Priesthood meeting and then Sacrament meeting. We didn’t have  any Sunday School. The Chapel was supposed to be a non-denominational building. We could only have it for a couple of hours on Sunday.

After work sometimes I would put on my boots and bundle up and head for the hills. I wanted to see what Yellowstone was all about. I would go up to the Hot Springs and walk around. It was really beautiful after it started to snow. The water steaming and bubbling and snow banks around the edges. Sometimes I would get in my little car and go to Gardner to the grocery store or the little gift shop. Sometimes we would head to Livingston to shop for cloths or shoes and a bigger grocery store. They also had a fabric store where I bought fabric so I could sew. Then I discovered Bozeman. It is a College town and they have bookstores and more fun places to eat and hang out. It was fun to get out of the Park and mingle with real people for a few hours.

My little car that I bought in California did not like the cold weather and I am afraid I did not take very good care of it. I did not really know how to take care of a car. Any way it got a leak in the oil line and no one in Gardner knew how to fix it. Some one told me I would have to get a plumber to fix the line. That did not sound right to me. Anyway someone offered me about $100 dollars for it and I sold it to them. I really felt bad. I really liked my little old Chevy. I went to Livingston and bought a used red Volkswagon. I had lots of fun with my little red Volkswagon.

I had a room mate Rhonda, I don’t remember her last name. I knew her from the Grand Canyon. I guess I was kind of a snot. I didn’t like her very much when we were working together at Grand and when they put her with me I was not very happy. But we soon learned to get along and appreciate each other. We started to do things together and had lots of fun.

Frank and I started spending lots of time together and he became interested in the Church. We got hold of the Missionaries and they started to teach him. Rhonda also became interested and she started to join the discussions. It was in the early spring that they both were baptized. It was a happy time for me. Frank wanted to marry me and I was ready.

It was October 1968. I loaded my little Chevy up with everything I thought I might need. I bought a warm winter coat and hat and heavy mittens and some boots. I could not knit at this point in my life. I took my sewing machine and sewing tools so I could make some cloths if I needed them. Then I kissed my parents goodbye and headed for Yellowstone Park. I had never driven so far by myself. I had maps of Idaho and Montana so that I would not get lost and off I went. I can’t remember exactly when I got there but I think it was just before Halloween.

I arrived with no idea of where I was supposed to be. I was supposed to report to the Hotel at Mammoth Hot Springs located at the North entrance to the park. I finally found someone who seemed to be expecting me and they set me up in the Hotel for a couple of days and then I was moved to some rooms above the Restaurant where I would be working. There was a girls dormitory  above the restaurant. I had a room to myself and then they put another girl in with me. This was another girl that had worked with me in Grand Canyon and I was not to happy to have to room with her. For some reason I got it into my head that I did not like her but I was taught a lesson that if you give people a chance most of the time you can find a common ground. We turned into pretty good friends.

I was put to work as a waitress in the restaurant. I would get up early in the morning and walk across the parking lot to open and it was so cold my nose would stick together and it felt like my lungs would freeze if I breathed too deeply. The roads into the park were closed and everyone was getting ready for winter. Mammoth Hot Springs was kept open to service the snowmobile-rs and the company offered snowmobile tours into the park. Everyone started to celebrate when it started to snow. Without the snow there would be no tours. I soon learned that during the week we had no customers. I would open the restaurant and a few of the Park employees would come in for coffee and breakfast. Then later they would come back for coffee breaks and sometimes we would serve a little lunch and then a few dinners but during the week it was really sloooooooow. Then it started to snow and snow and snow. My poor California car was not used to this cold weather and I am afraid I did not do a very good job of taking care of my poor little car. More about that later.

The Hotel started to bring in tours. Mostly on the weekends. By Thanksgiving we were getting pretty busy. The restaurant would set up a buffet on the weekends so as waitresses we served drinks and cleaned up plates. But there was time to talk to some of the guests it was fun. At one point they asked me if I would work in the bar and serve drinks. There were not enough waitresses that were over 21. I thought, what the heck, it was a chance to make more money in tips. The company hired some of the girls from Gardner, Montana, a little town just North of Mammoth. One of the girls was Phyllis Mack. She worked in the Bar with me. She was always talking about her brother. She thought I should go out with him. It was right around Valentines Day. We had a big party at the restaurant and after we cleaned up she talked me into going with her and some other men down to Gardner to party some more. Please remember I was still a small town girl. I really did not know what to expect. We ended up in another Bar and one of the guys was getting kind of handy. I wanted to go home and he kind of grabbed me and Frank (Pyllis’ Brother) stepped in and told him he would take me home and to leave me alone. I really had not officially meet him but I was grateful that he stood up for me. He took me back to my dorm and asked if he could call me. I said yes.

The season was winding down. I had no plans. School did not hold any appeal for me. I felt like I had no real skills and going back to Cedar did not seem like a very good idea. I did not want to live off my parents. Then some people came to Grand Canyon and said that they were here to offer anyone who wanted a Job in Yellowstone Park they would hire us for the winter in Yellowstone and then we could come back to the parks in Utah as supervisors or managers. That sounded good to me. A couple of the girls I was rooming with said that they would go too. We closed the store and the cafeteria. I headed back to Cedar and started to get ready to go to Yellowstone. My Mother was not happy with this idea. In looking back I think this is about the only time that I remember that she did not support what I had decided to do. I was determined to go. It turned out that the other girls changed their minds and did not go. So I headed off by myself.

I will close this chapter for now. Next the Yellowstone adventure begins.

I left California, left the first grown up job I ever had, left the first serious relationship, but I gained an aching heart, a feeling of failure, and an old 58 Chevy.

Got back to Cedar at loose ends. I hooked up with Phyllis Davis a friend from Drama Club. She was busy with Shakespeare Festival and gave me some tasks to do. I realized I needed a paying job and the only place I could think that I could get a job was with the Parks. I stayed with Festival until they were about finished for the summer and then I applied at the Parks. A few days later they called and offered me a job at Grand Canyon North Rim Store. Since I had a car I drove myself and checked in. The Store is about 2 miles from the main lodge and the employees stayed in little cabins. I was put in a cabin with four other girls. I found out after I got there that one of the reasons they wanted me was because I was over 21 and they had gotten into trouble for letting clerks who were under 21 sell beer. So one of my main responsibilities was to be the official beer seller. The store was stocked with a few groceries and souvenir items aimed at the campers. I really enjoyed working there. I learned a little bit about indian jewelery and rugs and because I was an employee we got a little discount. Because it was a small store we could talk to the customers and flirt with the boys. Since I had a car we could takes runs into Kanab if we wanted to.

One day about 4 guys came into the store to buy some beer. I made them show me Id’s and they teased me. One of the guys was really cute. They were all from Idaho and were working down in the Canyon building a bridge that had been damaged over the winter. They had hiked out of the canyon and wanted to go to the bar that was on the border of Arizona and Utah. They wanted me and a couple of the other girls to go with them. They were so cute and I thought what the heck. They had a truck and we all piled in and away we went. I get myself into these situations and then I realize that I really shouldn’t be there so I try to fake it. But they were funny and it was fun. We made it back and they had to go back down the canyon. About a week or so later there they were again. Ready to party. One of the boys seemed to really like me. I was flattered. I don’t remember the exact time line but at one point I found out the guy who ran the mules was taking some supplies down to them and I begged to go along. I rode the mules down the canyon to their work site and spent a little bit of time with them then we headed back up the canyon. Another time I found out a man that flew a Helicoper was taking some supplies down to them and I begged a ride. This time he left me and I had to spend the night. Shocking! They did not expect me but they were glad to see me. At least I think they were. Anyway they told me I had to make dinner so they left me alone to figure up what to make for these boys I really had never used a camp stove and I really did not know how they worked. But I figured something out and they said it was great. We sat around and talked and laughed. Then they found a place for me to sleep and in the morning I hiked out of the canyon by myself. Ok I never said I was very smart. I did some rather silly things. But these are really kind of fun memories.

Ok, I had a job, I had a steady boy friend. I thought life was good and it was. Wes took me to many places. He loved Country Western Music as it was called way back then and he introduced me to the real Country Music. I knew who Glenn Campbell was and Johnny Cash, and some of the others but he knew them all. He took me to a little club to see Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs. They played the theme for the Beverly Hillbillies. That’s all I knew but they were fantastic musicians it was a wonderful concert. A few times we went to some concerts that had several artists perform just a few of their songs. I can not remember all of them but I do remember seeing Johnny Cash and June Carter, (This was before they got married) and Glenn Campbell. He took me to a concert with Jimmy Dean, and one with Pat Boone. We went to Disneyland a couple of times and Griffith Park Observatory. One day we took the ferry to Catalina Island. He was in the National Guard and he had to spend some weekends and a couple of weeks doing Guard stuff.

Politically he was very conservative and most of his ideas were pretty much how I felt. I really thought we were in sync. He was always talking about a small town in Northern California that he really liked and someday he wanted to live there. Christmas 1967 he proposed and gave me a ring.

Tauna and I had moved to a smaller and cheaper apartment. Tensions between us were getting more strained. I thought we would be friends forever. But she was having a hard time keeping a job and paying her share of the rent and food expenses. Wes helped me find a used car to buy. It was a 1956 Chevy. I got a loan from the Credit Union through my work so I could buy the car. So I had transportation. That was good because the girl I was riding with was getting tired of being my chauffeur.

Finely Tauna and I had a big fight about what I can not remember. But I found a new apartment and moved out. Wes and I talked or saw each other every day. He would invite me over to his house and I really liked his parents and I think they liked me to. I thought every thing was moving along fine. Wes agreed to talk to the Missionaries but that did not go very well. He was not receptive. I was so naive I thought that anyone who listened to the missionaries would be touched by the spirit and be converted. But of course that is not the case. It takes an open heart and a willing spirit and sometimes it takes a long time. I was young and I wanted it Now.

I felt like I was really “in love” but as summer approached, Wes kept talking about going to Northern California for the summer. But to me it sounded like he was making plans without me. I tried to get him to explain what he was thinking but to no good. I finely decided that this was not going to work and I had no reason to stay. I myself had not kept in touch with the Church and I had no friends outside of Wes. If he left I would be all alone. I made the decision to break off the engagement, quit my job and move back home. (Note to any parents. You think they have left home for good, But they always come back. Count on it.)

I made arrangements for my parents to come and help me move back home. Spring 1968.

We finally arrived in Los Angeles and Danny DeGraw and his Mother met us at the train station. She took us to her home in Hawthorn. It was just a couple of days before the New Year so we went to the Stake Young Adult Singles New Years Eve Party. As soon as we could, we started looking for an apartment. We didn’t have any furniture so we were looking for furnished apartments. We finally found something that we thought was wonderful. The apartment complex even had a pool. But since it was winter the pool was not open. Then we started looking for jobs. We read the paper and tried to find things like receptionists. We really had no job skills. Tauna had worked as a waitress at Zion and I had cleaned cabins and worked in the snack shop. After we had been there just a few weeks Tauna’s sister asked if she could come and stay with us while she went to some Doctor appointments. She was having some serious problems with her eyes and the Lions Club in Cedar City sponsored her to see some specialist in LA. So we soon had another roommate. Things were starting to get a little tense. Neither one of us had found a job and money was starting to get short.

I finally went to a private employment agency and they sent me on a few interviews and one was with a drug company that had a warehouse and shipped prescription drugs all over the west. I was hired to stand all day in front of a long tub full of IBM punch cards. Each card represented a different drug. I would get the order and pull the cards for that order and send it back to the punch card room and they would run the cards through the punch card reader and print up the order to send back to the warehouse. It was challenging and fun to have a real job. One of the girls that worked there lived close to me and agreed to pick me up for work. I found out that the bus does not go everywhere. It did not go were I needed to go to get to work. So I had a way to work and then another girl asked me if I would like to met her boy friends brother. He had a Masters Degree from UCLA and was a CPA. He was working for a large accounting firm. And he was tall. How could I say no. His name was Wes Harder and he called me and made a date. I think we went to a movie the first time. He was taller than me and he had dark hair and he was pretty good looking; not too good looking to intimidate me but nice to look at. We seemed to get along very well. He started coming around on a regular basis. Tauna finally got a job and we were finally able to make the rent and buy food. Life seemed to be clicking along pretty well. After I had worked for about three months I qualified for some medical insurance and I went to a Dentist and he told me I needed to have my wisdom teeth out. Wes picked me up and took me. He was becoming quite an important part of my life.

Tauna was seeing quite bit of Danny DeGraw. We would go to the local Singles Ward but since neither one of us had transportation it was getting kind of hard to get to Church. Wards are not on every other corner in Los Angeles. Wes was not a member of the Church and he did not know very much about Mormons. He had some preconceived ideas and I tried to talk to him about it. He agreed to talk to the Missionaries but after that he was not very receptive. On the next visit he brought a bunch of anti Mormon books and the missionaries tried to talk to him but his mind was closed. He stilled liked me and his parents liked me. I Went with him to the Church that he said he went to. But no one seemed to know him and thinking about it now I realize he did not really belong to a Church the way I did. He was not ready to open his heart.

He had told me that he loved me and I figured I was in love too. No one had ever said that they loved me. I was so vulnerable. I was so hungry to be in love and get married and start a family. I had the romanticised idea that if we got married he would see how wonderful the church was and would embrace it and gain a testimony. I now know that was foolish and not the way things happen in the real world.