Barbara C Hoag.com

This is a talk I gave at Mothers Funeral January 2006.

“On January 17, 2006, Edwin Charles Cox came to the Orchard Park Care Center to conduct his sweet loving wife of 65 earthly year’s home to her Heavenly Father and to be greeted by her Mother and Father, Brothers, Sisters and many other friends and relatives.

Mother was born April 17, 1918 the 6th of 9 children born to Ettie Mae and Nels Sorensen.

The family moved from time to time as her Father found work. Eventually they settled in Pocatello, Idaho when her Father found steady work with the railroad.

Mother had many friends and several of them remained friends all her life. I always thought we were related to these ladies because we always visited them every time we went to Pocatello to Grandma Sorensen, Uncle Richard and Aunt Vera’s Families. In her later years these friends would still get togther and have a friend’s weekend. Mother told me they would laugh and talk just as they did when they were girls.

The story of how Mother met Dad has become a Cox Family Legend.

Mother was visiting her sister Viola Terry in Cedar City. Viola’s Husband knew that Dad was due home from his Mission and suggested that they drive to his home to see if he had returned. As they drove up to the house there was Dad, his back turned and his head in the trunk. All that Mom could see were his long legs. She thought to herself that this is one fine man. Dad called her up the next day and invited her to a dance. He persuaded her to delay her return to Pocatello a few more days. He took her fishin and on picnics and won her heart.

She said there was a letter waiting for her when she got back to Pocatello. They corresponded by letter for a few weeks then Dad arranged to meet her in Salt Lake City for the weekend of the LDS October General Conference. She told me of that weekend that she had never laughed so much. He proposed and they were married at her Mothers home in Pocatello, Idaho, October 30, 1941. Then they drove back to Cedar City with Dad’s sister Inez and because it was Pheasant season a shotgun at the ready. Then on November 5, 1941 they were sealed for time and all eternity in the St. George Temple.

They settled in Cedar City and began the business of life together. Sandra soon came to join the family the following year July 30th, 1942 and then Kathryn came along August 31st, 1943. At this time Dad was working for the Southern Utah Power Company. Then he was called into the Army Air Corpse and Mother moved back to Pocatello to be with her Mother because she was expecting another baby. Dad was stationed in Denver when Douglas was born July 24, 1944. Mother moved back to Cedar City when Dad was stationed at Neils Air Force Base near Las Vegas. The war ended and Dad was released from the Army. Soon I came along March 29th, 1946. Then Richard joined our happy family to make us complete August 4th, 1949.

Mother was a fastidious homemaker, an excellent cook and baker. We would wake in the morning to her singing in the kitchen as she prepared breakfast. We often woke to the smell of newly baked bread. The sink would sometimes be full of trout that Dad had caught that morning before he went to work. We then knew we would have trout that evening perfectly boned and cooked to perfection under the broiler. She could take a few ingredients and make a wonderful meal.

Mother was a talented and creative seamstress. She taught each of her girls to cook and sew. She made dresses for our birthdays, Christmas, Easter and for each new school year. We had to wear dresses to school, no jeans of pants. She sewed a whole wardrobe for a doll I was given for Christmas one year. She was not very happy with me when instead of dressing the doll I dressed the family cat.

Mother was adventurous and willing to take charge and have some fun. She would load us kids in the car and off we would go to Zion, Bryce or Cedar Breaks for a day of hiking and picnics. She took Sandra, Kathryn, me and our Cousin Lyona to Pocatello one summer to visit Grandma Sorensen. We stopped at Lagoon and had  wonderful time even though we had to be rescued from the fun house rolling tunnel. I still have a picture in my mind of Mother hugging her dress around her legs as a burst of air shot up from below.

Kathryn remembers another time Mother loaded us all into the car along with some invited friends to go on a picnic to Navajo Lake. Bening there with Mother, the beautiful food and fun friends made a wonderful day. Dad wasn’t there to lead us in hiking of water games, just Mom, and it was so much fun.

We all remember snuggling up to her as she read bedtime stories or poems from “101 Famous Poems”. “Which one would you like to hear?” “The Spider and the Fly”, or “Little Boy Blue” or perhaps “Out to Old Aunt Mary’s”. We each had our favorites, she would read until her tongue was thick and then she would say “OK that’s enough, time for bed.” We all knew we were loved.

There were a few notable mishaps or missteps however. Mother found a cake recipe that she continued to make even though it had not received a good reception the first time. It was a Caraway Seed Cake, not too bad a long as you didn’t bite into one of those seeds. The problem of course was there were lots of seeds. Another time she had baked and decorated cupcakes complete with a candle in each one for one of our birthday parties. She put them in the oven to get them out of the way. She forgot they were there and you guessed it, she turned on the oven and the candles melted and the decorations were ruined. But not to worry Dad just picked off the melted wax and ate them anyway.

As her family grew she nourished, taught and loved each one. She found much joy in her Grandchildren and Great Grandchildren. Kathryn recalls how her young children would squeal with delight when Grandma would come. Mother would get right down on the floor with them cross her eyes and growl like a bear and chase them around the room. They loved it.

She helped Dad in his various callings in the Church and activities in the community. Including being active in the Lady Lions, she served as President of the PTA and President of the Young Women in the MIA. Mom and Dad were active in the Sons of the Utah Pioneers and Mother was a counselor in Relief Society and taught the Spiritual Living Lesson for several years.

Mom and Dad spent many years as ordinance workers in the St. George Temple. At that time the sessions were still live and they learned all the parts. I had the special privilege to attend many sessions as my parents and Uncle Reid and Aunt Wanda took part.

When Dad retired from the Power Company they served three missions for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. They were called to the Los Angeles Temple visitor’s center, then the Hawaiian Temple visitor’s center, and finally Nauvoo. They loved to travel, exploring new places and enjoying the wonders of this great land. They made many trips around the United States, Canada, Alaska and even into Mexico. They instilled in each of us a love for our Country and the beauties of this wonderful world. They loved making new friends and sharing many of these experiences with  Andrea’s parents and the many friends they made during their missions and other associations. Everywhere they went they made friends that remained friends for life.

Mother loved the Gospel and was constantly studying and reading the scriptures. [I was given Mother's set of scriptures. As I have used them in Sunday School I continue to find little notes on scraps of paper in her handwriting. Most are just brief notes and don't make a lot of sense. But they are like little treasures.]

Mother we love you and we will miss you. We are so grateful for your influence and the examples you set for us. We know you are happy and at peace back in the loving arms of your Eternal Companion.

Amen”

I decided to take this story and give it it’s own home.

West of our house there were two homes. The Mackelprang brothers and their families. Don and his wife Lou had two daughters. They were older than us. The two Mackelprang sisters graduated from College and took teaching jobs in a small town in Eastern Utah. I don’t remember exactly all the details but my sister Sandra told me it was in the late fifties. There was a flu epidemic and both of these girls got very ill. One of the girls LouDon contracted Phenomena also and she died. Sandra said she also was very ill that year she was a Junior in High School. This must have been my first encounter with the loss of life. I did not know her very well. But I remember her as being a very nice looking young woman.

These two brothers were ranchers. They herded sheep and they had horses and some milk cows. They kept their stock in a coral west of Uncle Reids’ house. One of the horses name was Fairy Feet. She was black with a white blaze on her forehead and white stockings. I thought she was the most beautiful horse in the world. We would coax her over to the fence and give her sugar cubes and carrots.

The Mackelprangs had a wagon that they kept in the corral that looked like a trailer. It was called a sheep wagon. They would take it out to wherever the sheep were being kept and live in the wagon as they tended to the sheep. I remember sneaking into that wagon when it was in their corral and investigating. I remember being shocked that  coffee was there as one of the supplies. No one I knew drank coffee. I grew up very sheltered.

When I was about eleven or twelve, I used to go over to the Mackelprangs and beg to ride the horses. Finally Mr. Mackelprang let me ride Fairy Feet. He was very kind and indulgent of a silly young girl. I used to go over and beg and he would give me small jobs to do and then he would show me how to saddle up the horse and let me ride. At first I had to stay inside the corral but as he thought I had more experience he would let me take her out on the street and ride out west of town. I begged him to let me ride Fairy Feet in the 24thof July Parade but he said it was really hard to control a horse in that situation and he would not let me. I realize now that he was right and I was not experienced enough to handle a horse in a parade. But at the time I thought I could do anything. I had a pair of marching boots that belonged to my sister Kathryn, I used them as cowboy boots. Those were great days. I wanted cowboy boots for Christmas but never got them. I wanted a horse too but that never happened either.

When I was twelve I got Appendicitis and had to have an operation. I was in the hospital for about a week. When they released me from the hospital I had a hard time standing up straight. The doctor gave me a whole list of things I could not do until my incision was completely healed.  I started feeling better and energetic and wanted to get back to riding “my” horse. But Don said “NO” he said I could break open my incision. I begged but it was to no avail. He would not budge. That was the end of my horse riding days. I started Jr High and got involved in MIA and school activities. But I will  always have the treasured memories of the time I spent with Fairy Feet.

Years later when I returned to Cedar City as a young widow I went to visit Lou and Don. It was nice to see them again. I was Lou’s visiting teacher for a short time. She was always very gracious to me.

Before I begin I must explain that we had a little crisis and some of my posts were lost so I need to re-due them. It will be hard to recreate them just as they were so please bare with me as we start this journey together again. Thank you for reading.

Sometime during the winter Phyllis and I were asked to serve a special dinner party. It was to be held at the Park Managers Home.  We were told the special guest was Lowell Thomas. He was a famous radio broadcaster and a world traveler. I remember watching TV specials of his travels to many far and interesting places. We were told he had never been to Yellowstone. I was amazed. He was very nice and he got Phyllis and I together and we had our picture taken with him.

Soon after Frank was baptized we started to plan our wedding. I wanted to use the Chapel we met in but another couple had already reserved it so we had to make other arrangements. When I look back at this time I was so oblivious as to what was right and proper to do. I thought that getting married in a “Church” was the most important thing. So we asked if we could use the local Church of Christ Chapel. We wanted our Branch President to do the ceremony. OK so we were going to get married in a Church of Christ Chapel and a Mormon Branch President was going to preform the ceremony. La La La La, merrily we go along. Our poor Branch President was not really very happy about this arraignment. I really don’t know why he didn’t sit me down and give me a good talking too. I called my Mother and Father and told them that we were planning to get married August 2, 1969.

We went to Livingston and I purchased some flocked cotton fabric and a pattern and started making my wedding dress. My Aunt Wanda made and decorated a wedding cake for us and my parents brought it all the way up from Cedar City, Utah. They stopped in Pocatello, Idaho to visit with  my Mothers sister Vera and her husband Keith Tolman. They came with some of their children for the ceremony. My sister Sandra and her Husband Max came also. My Cousin John Cox flew a small plane with his girlfriend Carolyn. I was really surprised to see all these relatives. One of Franks neighbors  organized some refreshments for a small reception for us.

Everything worked out and we were married. After we said goodbye to everyone we headed to Cody, Wyoming for a couple of days.  Oh the folies of youth.

 Frank’s neighbor had a small cabin between her house and Frank’s parents. She said we could live there until we found something better. There was a bathroom, and a room big enough for a bed and a very small kitchenette. One day Frank’s Dad came over,  he had a wooden rolling pin in his hand. He gave it to me and said I could use it for other things than just rolling out pie crust. He was implying that if Frank needed a talking to, the rolling pin might be a good exclamation point. Another time he gave me a large chefs knife. I really liked Frank’s Dad. Franks Mother gave me a Platter that she said had been in her family for years. She said it came from England. I think it is from Wedgwood.

Soon after we were married Frank got a letter from Boeing Aircraft offering him a job in Everett, Washington. If he accepted he would start work around the first part of September. They would send a mover to help us move. I was really looking forward to starting a new life in a new place. We started to get ready to move to Washington.

Life in Yellowstone was pretty routine. I put my time in at the restaurant and then there was time to play. There is a chapel built on the property at Mammoth and there was a small branch of the Church that met there on Sundays. The Branch President was one of the Rangers. One of the ladies I worked with was a member and most of the members were either employees of the park service or employees of the vendor. I was asked to lead the music in Sacrament meeting. Sometimes we didn’t have a piano player. They had a Priesthood meeting and then Sacrament meeting. We didn’t have  any Sunday School. The Chapel was supposed to be a non-denominational building. We could only have it for a couple of hours on Sunday.

After work sometimes I would put on my boots and bundle up and head for the hills. I wanted to see what Yellowstone was all about. I would go up to the Hot Springs and walk around. It was really beautiful after it started to snow. The water steaming and bubbling and snow banks around the edges. Sometimes I would get in my little car and go to Gardner to the grocery store or the little gift shop. Sometimes we would head to Livingston to shop for cloths or shoes and a bigger grocery store. They also had a fabric store where I bought fabric so I could sew. Then I discovered Bozeman. It is a College town and they have bookstores and more fun places to eat and hang out. It was fun to get out of the Park and mingle with real people for a few hours.

My little car that I bought in California did not like the cold weather and I am afraid I did not take very good care of it. I did not really know how to take care of a car. Any way it got a leak in the oil line and no one in Gardner knew how to fix it. Some one told me I would have to get a plumber to fix the line. That did not sound right to me. Anyway someone offered me about $100 dollars for it and I sold it to them. I really felt bad. I really liked my little old Chevy. I went to Livingston and bought a used red Volkswagon. I had lots of fun with my little red Volkswagon.

I had a room mate Rhonda, I don’t remember her last name. I knew her from the Grand Canyon. I guess I was kind of a snot. I didn’t like her very much when we were working together at Grand and when they put her with me I was not very happy. But we soon learned to get along and appreciate each other. We started to do things together and had lots of fun.

Frank and I started spending lots of time together and he became interested in the Church. We got hold of the Missionaries and they started to teach him. Rhonda also became interested and she started to join the discussions. It was in the early spring that they both were baptized. It was a happy time for me. Frank wanted to marry me and I was ready.

It was October 1968. I loaded my little Chevy up with everything I thought I might need. I bought a warm winter coat and hat and heavy mittens and some boots. I could not knit at this point in my life. I took my sewing machine and sewing tools so I could make some cloths if I needed them. Then I kissed my parents goodbye and headed for Yellowstone Park. I had never driven so far by myself. I had maps of Idaho and Montana so that I would not get lost and off I went. I can’t remember exactly when I got there but I think it was just before Halloween.

I arrived with no idea of where I was supposed to be. I was supposed to report to the Hotel at Mammoth Hot Springs located at the North entrance to the park. I finally found someone who seemed to be expecting me and they set me up in the Hotel for a couple of days and then I was moved to some rooms above the Restaurant where I would be working. There was a girls dormitory  above the restaurant. I had a room to myself and then they put another girl in with me. This was another girl that had worked with me in Grand Canyon and I was not to happy to have to room with her. For some reason I got it into my head that I did not like her but I was taught a lesson that if you give people a chance most of the time you can find a common ground. We turned into pretty good friends.

I was put to work as a waitress in the restaurant. I would get up early in the morning and walk across the parking lot to open and it was so cold my nose would stick together and it felt like my lungs would freeze if I breathed too deeply. The roads into the park were closed and everyone was getting ready for winter. Mammoth Hot Springs was kept open to service the snowmobile-rs and the company offered snowmobile tours into the park. Everyone started to celebrate when it started to snow. Without the snow there would be no tours. I soon learned that during the week we had no customers. I would open the restaurant and a few of the Park employees would come in for coffee and breakfast. Then later they would come back for coffee breaks and sometimes we would serve a little lunch and then a few dinners but during the week it was really sloooooooow. Then it started to snow and snow and snow. My poor California car was not used to this cold weather and I am afraid I did not do a very good job of taking care of my poor little car. More about that later.

The Hotel started to bring in tours. Mostly on the weekends. By Thanksgiving we were getting pretty busy. The restaurant would set up a buffet on the weekends so as waitresses we served drinks and cleaned up plates. But there was time to talk to some of the guests it was fun. At one point they asked me if I would work in the bar and serve drinks. There were not enough waitresses that were over 21. I thought, what the heck, it was a chance to make more money in tips. The company hired some of the girls from Gardner, Montana, a little town just North of Mammoth. One of the girls was Phyllis Mack. She worked in the Bar with me. She was always talking about her brother. She thought I should go out with him. It was right around Valentines Day. We had a big party at the restaurant and after we cleaned up she talked me into going with her and some other men down to Gardner to party some more. Please remember I was still a small town girl. I really did not know what to expect. We ended up in another Bar and one of the guys was getting kind of handy. I wanted to go home and he kind of grabbed me and Frank (Pyllis’ Brother) stepped in and told him he would take me home and to leave me alone. I really had not officially meet him but I was grateful that he stood up for me. He took me back to my dorm and asked if he could call me. I said yes.

The season was winding down. I had no plans. School did not hold any appeal for me. I felt like I had no real skills and going back to Cedar did not seem like a very good idea. I did not want to live off my parents. Then some people came to Grand Canyon and said that they were here to offer anyone who wanted a Job in Yellowstone Park they would hire us for the winter in Yellowstone and then we could come back to the parks in Utah as supervisors or managers. That sounded good to me. A couple of the girls I was rooming with said that they would go too. We closed the store and the cafeteria. I headed back to Cedar and started to get ready to go to Yellowstone. My Mother was not happy with this idea. In looking back I think this is about the only time that I remember that she did not support what I had decided to do. I was determined to go. It turned out that the other girls changed their minds and did not go. So I headed off by myself.

I will close this chapter for now. Next the Yellowstone adventure begins.

I left California, left the first grown up job I ever had, left the first serious relationship, but I gained an aching heart, a feeling of failure, and an old 58 Chevy.

Got back to Cedar at loose ends. I hooked up with Phyllis Davis a friend from Drama Club. She was busy with Shakespeare Festival and gave me some tasks to do. I realized I needed a paying job and the only place I could think that I could get a job was with the Parks. I stayed with Festival until they were about finished for the summer and then I applied at the Parks. A few days later they called and offered me a job at Grand Canyon North Rim Store. Since I had a car I drove myself and checked in. The Store is about 2 miles from the main lodge and the employees stayed in little cabins. I was put in a cabin with four other girls. I found out after I got there that one of the reasons they wanted me was because I was over 21 and they had gotten into trouble for letting clerks who were under 21 sell beer. So one of my main responsibilities was to be the official beer seller. The store was stocked with a few groceries and souvenir items aimed at the campers. I really enjoyed working there. I learned a little bit about indian jewelery and rugs and because I was an employee we got a little discount. Because it was a small store we could talk to the customers and flirt with the boys. Since I had a car we could takes runs into Kanab if we wanted to.

One day about 4 guys came into the store to buy some beer. I made them show me Id’s and they teased me. One of the guys was really cute. They were all from Idaho and were working down in the Canyon building a bridge that had been damaged over the winter. They had hiked out of the canyon and wanted to go to the bar that was on the border of Arizona and Utah. They wanted me and a couple of the other girls to go with them. They were so cute and I thought what the heck. They had a truck and we all piled in and away we went. I get myself into these situations and then I realize that I really shouldn’t be there so I try to fake it. But they were funny and it was fun. We made it back and they had to go back down the canyon. About a week or so later there they were again. Ready to party. One of the boys seemed to really like me. I was flattered. I don’t remember the exact time line but at one point I found out the guy who ran the mules was taking some supplies down to them and I begged to go along. I rode the mules down the canyon to their work site and spent a little bit of time with them then we headed back up the canyon. Another time I found out a man that flew a Helicoper was taking some supplies down to them and I begged a ride. This time he left me and I had to spend the night. Shocking! They did not expect me but they were glad to see me. At least I think they were. Anyway they told me I had to make dinner so they left me alone to figure up what to make for these boys I really had never used a camp stove and I really did not know how they worked. But I figured something out and they said it was great. We sat around and talked and laughed. Then they found a place for me to sleep and in the morning I hiked out of the canyon by myself. Ok I never said I was very smart. I did some rather silly things. But these are really kind of fun memories.

Ok, I had a job, I had a steady boy friend. I thought life was good and it was. Wes took me to many places. He loved Country Western Music as it was called way back then and he introduced me to the real Country Music. I knew who Glenn Campbell was and Johnny Cash, and some of the others but he knew them all. He took me to a little club to see Lester Flatt and Earl Scruggs. They played the theme for the Beverly Hillbillies. That’s all I knew but they were fantastic musicians it was a wonderful concert. A few times we went to some concerts that had several artists perform just a few of their songs. I can not remember all of them but I do remember seeing Johnny Cash and June Carter, (This was before they got married) and Glenn Campbell. He took me to a concert with Jimmy Dean, and one with Pat Boone. We went to Disneyland a couple of times and Griffith Park Observatory. One day we took the ferry to Catalina Island. He was in the National Guard and he had to spend some weekends and a couple of weeks doing Guard stuff.

Politically he was very conservative and most of his ideas were pretty much how I felt. I really thought we were in sync. He was always talking about a small town in Northern California that he really liked and someday he wanted to live there. Christmas 1967 he proposed and gave me a ring.

Tauna and I had moved to a smaller and cheaper apartment. Tensions between us were getting more strained. I thought we would be friends forever. But she was having a hard time keeping a job and paying her share of the rent and food expenses. Wes helped me find a used car to buy. It was a 1956 Chevy. I got a loan from the Credit Union through my work so I could buy the car. So I had transportation. That was good because the girl I was riding with was getting tired of being my chauffeur.

Finely Tauna and I had a big fight about what I can not remember. But I found a new apartment and moved out. Wes and I talked or saw each other every day. He would invite me over to his house and I really liked his parents and I think they liked me to. I thought every thing was moving along fine. Wes agreed to talk to the Missionaries but that did not go very well. He was not receptive. I was so naive I thought that anyone who listened to the missionaries would be touched by the spirit and be converted. But of course that is not the case. It takes an open heart and a willing spirit and sometimes it takes a long time. I was young and I wanted it Now.

I felt like I was really “in love” but as summer approached, Wes kept talking about going to Northern California for the summer. But to me it sounded like he was making plans without me. I tried to get him to explain what he was thinking but to no good. I finely decided that this was not going to work and I had no reason to stay. I myself had not kept in touch with the Church and I had no friends outside of Wes. If he left I would be all alone. I made the decision to break off the engagement, quit my job and move back home. (Note to any parents. You think they have left home for good, But they always come back. Count on it.)

I made arrangements for my parents to come and help me move back home. Spring 1968.